| -_- |
[Aug. 1st, 2005|01:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bitchy | ] |
I'm so sick of it. I mean everything. I'm sick of parents who freak out because I go out to lunch with my boyfriend, when I was in town anyway. I'm sick of a sister who expects me to be her best friend whenever she wants something or when it's convenient for them, but as soon as I need something, or blame turns to her, she just turns her back on me in a split second. I'm sick of people who send you in 20 different directions before they finally admit that don't have a clue what they're doing. I'm sick of people acting like they want to be close to me, and then doing everything they can to push me away. I just wish I could get out. I know I probably just sound like a whiney teenager, but I honestly just can't take all this pressure and sheltering anymore... |
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| damn technology! |
[Jul. 20th, 2005|09:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | frustrated | ] |
Ok, first off, my cell phone has officially died, and with it, my entire phone book of friends phone #s. So, if anyone wishes to get ahold of me, you'll have to call my house or email me (breezr1@aol.com). Many apologies to anyone who has tried to contact me in the last week. I don't hate you...I just can't get your messages...
Anyway, this week has been...mediocre at best. My mom has had me doing the usual 500 chores a day, and the only contact I've had with people is Taekwondo. I am desperate to do something...no...ANYTHING. However, a glimmer of hope came to me today in the form of friend Austin. He invited me on a boating trip this Friday with his family. Yay! Fresh air! Even better, his sis, Amanda, invited Emmie too! Ok, so I am definitely excited. Lots of fun with awesome people. Let's just hope I don't screw it up before Friday...
I miss Roncalli people!!! I mean, TKD friends are great, but there's only so much you can do with one group of people before you miss the old crowd. I really want to do something soon...
In other news, Jake wants to take me to the Puffy AmiYumi concert in Chicago next month. At first, I was extremely excited. Jpop concert that I don't have to go to Japan to see...come on, dream come true, right? Wrong. My parents will never let me go. I mentioned it casually to my mom, and she practically said no on the spot. Oh well, not that surprised I guess...
On a brighter topic, I found yet another manga that will probably be one of my next obsessions. Abosulute Boyfriend! It's kinda like Chobits, but flip-flopped. Robotic guys instead.
Anyway, that's it for my life as of yet.
Later |
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| *excited sqeal*! |
[Jul. 18th, 2005|05:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  excited | ] |
Harry Potter is so great! I finished yesterday, but I'm still in absolute euphoria over it! J.K. Rowling is a genius when it comes to teen angst and plot developement! I never thought I was one of those overly obsessed people, but after finishing the book, I definitely had a HP movie marathon with my sister, and an in depth discussion about the book. (I still say I'm not obsessed [ Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<_<>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] Harry Potter is so great! I finished yesterday, but I'm still in absolute euphoria over it! J.K. Rowling is a genius when it comes to teen angst and plot developement! I never thought I was one of those overly obsessed people, but after finishing the book, I definitely had a HP movie marathon with my sister, and an in depth discussion about the book. (I still say I'm not obsessed <_< >_>)
And...out. |
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| sigh..... |
[Jul. 12th, 2005|11:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  loved | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Think of Me- Phantom of the Opera | ] |
I just had an amazing night. I am loved. I am in love. The End |
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| I can never think of a subject....o_O |
[Jul. 9th, 2005|04:09 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  complacent | ] |
| [ | music |
| | um...random Naruto theme? | ] |
Wow, last night was possibly the best fun I've had all summer! I finally got the chance to hang out with some Roncalli people, a goal I was beginning to lose hope in. Sadly, Jake had to work and could not join, but I was still glad to see everyone. The bands were great, the people were awesome, and life is good. Unfortunately I couldn't even stay long enough to hear Fairview's entire performance. Early curfew. Parents suck. The usual.
I feel like I've missed out on so much the last three years of high school... That whole time I have been content sitting in the back of the classroom as everyone else goes on about their exciting weekends, or sitting on the top row of bleachers as my class cheers on our winning teams. I've been the quiet one (except with a select group of friends). Somehow I've managed to stereotype myself. Glue myself the the concept that I'm not like "them". I can only be myself as an outcast. Lately...I want more. How can I be myself if no one sees who "myself" is?
In other news... I want school already. The sooner out of this house, the better. |
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| Yay...adult...kinda...o_O |
[Jun. 15th, 2005|02:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
Ok, so I'm 18...yay. Am I supposed to feel different? Well, it's been a nice birthday so far. I started early with a BEAUTIFUL rendition of "Happy Birthday" sung to my by my one and only at midnight. Jake also took me to breakfast to celebrate. Other than that it's been a normal day. I filled out some job applications and stuff (much better opportunities now that I'm legal). But that's about it. Ok, so, um...ya |
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| Chicken...so much chicken...o_O |
[Jun. 13th, 2005|02:23 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | busy | ] |
Ok, so yesterday I worked the OLG chicken dinner (Kevin you can thank later-I accept cash, check, or pledgings of souls ^_-). It was pretty fun with Keith, Kelly, Kevin, Brian and Jake there as well. Anyways, afterwards I went to eat at the St. Joe chicken dinner in shelbyville...NO MORE CHICKEN...PLZ?
Yeah, then there was the family birthday party for Morgan and me. It would have been fun if I hadn't been cleaning and cooking all day...(I was exhausted by the time the thing actually started).
Well, life has been kinda boring. As comes with every summer, I already miss the Roncalli crowd. I've been hanging out with TKD friends, but they are mostly adults (adults who still think they're 16, but still adults) Anyway, I am simply ready for school.
Well, scratch that, I wanna go to Florida, and then I'm ready for school. Although I'm not as excited for Nationals as I thought I would be... |
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|
| eh...cleaning |
[Jun. 3rd, 2005|01:37 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Cher- Song for the Brokenhearted (I think?) | ] |
Once again...cleaning. At least I'm getting paid good allowance for it (man I need a job -__-) It's about time I did laundry anyway...my bed was about to disappear completely under my piled clothing O_o.
Well...had some artistic inspiration last night. I was hoping to get a head start on my AP work, but of course my inspiration can't help me at all. I wanna do a collage. I have all this random geisha stuff...pictures, post cards, shirts, etc..., a bunch of pretty chopsticks, asian brocade fabric and origami supplies...just sitting in my room. Anyway, I have lots of ideas, but I can't do anything until my grandpa helps me paint the old bulletin board I'm using as a background (I know nothing about wood primer and the like). Ok, anyway, I'm excited and really want to do it...
In other news...um...Jake took my anime -_-. I am totally having Fruits Basket Withdrawl Syndrome... Oh well, maybe I'll watch Spirited Away again (It's been a while and I miss the art *drool*) OH YA!!! I HAVE AZU MANGA DAIOH 3 AND 4!!! Oh I am so gonna be reading tonight...
Um...ya...cleaning...-_- |
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| Welcome back...to me...o_O |
[Jun. 3rd, 2005|12:26 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | annoyed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | no music...head hurts...o_O | ] |
Ok, so I haven't posted in um...3 months? Anyway, ya... summer is so far boring so I've decided to start keeping my lj again. Did I mention summer is boring? I've cleaned my house so many times I think I'm actually scrubbing the paint off the walls...Been training for Nationals...Ok, so I lied, this part is fun...Anyways, birthday upcoming...big 18 (not too excited because I figure, even if I were turning 45 my parents wouldn't give me a curfew later than 11) I WANT COLLEGE! Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, but I'd like to have some room to breathe. Just an inch, or two, or a billion... Plus I'd like to spend 2 minutes with my boyfriend of 3 years without being interrogated or chaperoned by my younger sister (not that I really mind, morgan's awesome). Oh well, one year. I can do it.
btw, Happy 18th to Keevin ^_- |
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| btw |
[Mar. 27th, 2005|10:34 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | ^_- | ] |
Andy, you are awesome...to the MAX!!! ^_- |
|
|
| oy... |
[Mar. 25th, 2005|05:00 pm] |
|
So...ya, been a long while since my last post. I'm feeling a little tired and torn at the moment so ya... Well, once again Jake and I are contemplating a retreat from each other. With all the parental and personal drama right now, I just want to be free for a while and I think it would be good for him too. I'm honestly not sure how it will go. We still care for each other so much and he's my best friend, whether we're dating or not...However, I really think that this would improve my family situation slightly....um, gotta go pick up sister. More on this later. |
|
|
| .... |
[Mar. 11th, 2005|02:36 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | hyper | ] |
Yay!!! tournament tomorrow!! so excited! I getta break board! Ok...I'm too hyper...I think I'm just gonna go now... |
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| "MORGAN, YOU TWIT!!!!! -_-" *screams in desperate disbelief* |
[Mar. 6th, 2005|07:49 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Hawaiian Roller Coaster Ride-from Lilo and Stitch-Jump 5 | ] |
Wonderful day....not. My genius of a sister managed to erase my entire TOS file.-_-....I wouldn't be so mad, but I've worked since Christmas on leveling the stats on those characters...I just can't believe it's gone...I know it was an accident, but I'm still gonna make morgan level my characters back up on my new file. Oh and she's not allowed on her own file until I beat the entire game again.
On the brighter side, my mom took me to find a prom dress today. I found a really fun one. It's very cool and kinda salsa-like...Oh, and highlight of my day: I get to go to prom with Jake ^_^!!!!! I have a feeling we'll get a huge pre-prom lecture, but I don't really care.
And I'm off...AP test to do |
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| IU+martial arts=^_^yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!! |
[Mar. 5th, 2005|11:37 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm | ] |
Ok, last night was great. Went to TKD and worked out as usual, except with the kids. Afterwards the class celebrated our school's 1 year anniversary with awards, talking, and AWESOME food (Shun's mom, I love you and your noodles ^_^!!!!) I also got to see hang out with Emmie, which is always great, and play dodgeball and volleyball w/the little kids. Afterwards, I was invited to go hang out with Emmie and Jennifer, but I was tired and figured my parents wouldn't let me anyways (-_-). So instead I just stayed around and spent a few precious moments with Thalionore. I really just want to hang out with him...Go to a movie or something, I don't care. The only time I ever see him is TKD, and it's just not the same...My parents just don't understand. Not only have they separated a couple, but also best friends. Now, we can't just be ourselves, we have to conform *cringe* to my parents' stupidity...Well, bye for now.... |
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| whatever |
[Mar. 3rd, 2005|05:52 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blah | ] |
um...yep...Go procrastination...English due tomorrow...Why am I such a bad student? |
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| Estoy yendo loco! |
[Mar. 2nd, 2005|05:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | no...pissed | ] |
Ok, rant time, I am honestly about to slap these two girls in my Spanish class! I don't like to say this about anyone, but they honestly must be the STUPIDEST people I have ever met. The entire year, Sra. G. has been going to all measures to make these two SHUT UP, but the continue to talk, ask stupid questions, and disrupt the class in any way they can. Personally I can't understand how anyone can be that disrespectful. Sra. G goes out of her way to make the class understandable, as well as enjoyable. She is the sweetest teacher I've ever met, whose only wish is for her students to succeed. However, these girls seem determined to push her over the edge! It's not fair to Sra. G, or the class, who are trying to learn while these two cause interruptions every two minutes!
Today, I was so annoyed, that I cast a dirty look in their direction, just out of total disbelief. Their response? Make fun of me and cause yet another disruption. I can't believe that anyone could be so self-centered. They are not only driving Sra. crazy, but disrespecting every other person in the class. I am so fed up with this shit. It's unfair for them to treat such a kindhearted person as Sra. G with such disrespect. They just don't understand how lucky we are to have her... |
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|
| (no subject) |
[Mar. 2nd, 2005|04:26 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  discontent | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Groove Coverage-Far Away From Home | ] |
GRRRRR.....I abhor high school drama. Why do things have to be so complicated at this point in our lives? ...Of course there are the raging hormones, mega-stress, stupid people and a world that generally sucks sometimes...but besides all that... I'm just tired of hearing "What did so and so say?", "OMG, I can believe she called me that!","I hate him because...", "I'm gonna beat your face in!"(overheard yelling match over some guy who is probably a player and not worth starting a class in the middle of Algebra) Why can't anyone grow up? This does not exclude me, considering I am also guilty of being involved in petty battles and the like, but lately it's different. Recently, I've only tried to interfere in such situations to point out the fact that its immature, petty, and ultimately, life goes on. The difference is, life goes on one friend short of happiness. How can a friend be dropped over a guy, or stupid words said at a party? They are minute issues in the large scheme of things. Some friends part naturally, but one must look back and think, in 10 years, will that matter? In 10 years when I need my friends more than anything because I'm dealing with 4 kids, a job, overdue bills, and a thousand other problems, and that one friend, who had stuck with you until that one fateful arguement, is not there, will there be a difference? Ya, maybe some things are none of my business, but why throw away something as powerful as a friendship, just because words were said? It's highschool. In a few short months, it will be over and none of it will matter. I doubt the reasons for the quarrels, the disagreements, the separations will even be remembered, but the scars remain in the form of a void in the heart, a place once occupied by the love of a friend.
Everyone, welcome to Kindergarten,Level 2: Hormone Phase |
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| Did we all time travel back to Jr. High and not tell Hoshiko? |
[Feb. 27th, 2005|10:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | annoyed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I Did My Time-Korn, AMV(Naruto) by Thalionore | ] |
Ok, things are happening, I don't know the whole story, but from what I can gather, it sounds like the petty shit that I used to deal with in Jr. High...Let's just all grow up why don't we? Well, I have better things to worry about than friends going at each other's throats for reasons that just aren't worth it...I have AP homework that I've kept til the last min as usual, so, I'm gonna go do it. Whatever... |
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| Yay!!! finally out! |
[Feb. 21st, 2005|10:25 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | energetic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Groove Coverage-not sure of title ^_^ | ] |
Yes....Finally out of the house!!! I'm on my way out to meet some friends in Shelbyville, and somehow I pursueded my mom to let Thalionore come. I'm really happy. Hopefully it'll be fun. I'm really glad because thalionore has been really depressed since the whole ordeal last week. I just want things to go back to normal...Well, I gotta run, Friend needs a ride...Laters. |
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| i dunno.... |
[Feb. 8th, 2005|07:42 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crappy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | my pounding brain | ] |
Went to doctor today, she said she thinks I have sinuses, or maybe strep? If not they could do a mono test...Ya, effective visit...Let's go on 2 medicines even tho they might not work, ok...Anyway, still feelin like shit. Last night was nice tho...Thalionore dropped by w/chocolates (chocolate for sick? oh well, cute anyway...)In other news, had an ENJOYABLE day listening to my Granny and great-uncle go at it all day..."No Jim, you can't live by yourself"...."YES I CAN!..." and so on... I wish he could understand that we only want the best for him...I guess that would be hard to understand from his perspective... Why such a cruel disease? My mom started crying because he forgot who she was the other day...thought she was a maid from church... It's really hard on the family, especially my Granny... I just wish I could do more to help, but I always feel like a burden now... |
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